A Little Update
By Gabrielle.
Oh. You. You wonderful people. Your good, kind words have been so soothing for me to read. I can’t tell you how much the support means to me. Thank you a dozen times over for taking the time to leave a comment or send an email or say a prayer on my behalf. I feel it.
A little update: I’ve taken it as easy as possible over the last few days. And I do feel like I’m seeing some improvement, but I’ve decided to see a doctor anyway — it just seems better to have a plan in place in case my mental state takes a turn for the worse. And since I can see that my mind is going to be fragile for many weeks (if not months), I’m hoping a doctor can help me stay stable through the worst of it.
I’ve been thinking about what it means for me to take it easy — while still parenting my kids, keeping appointments, getting ready for school, celebrating birthdays, etc. — and it’s less straightforward than I would have guessed. In my head, I was picturing “taking it easy” as sitting still for as much of the day as possible, but it hasn’t looked like that. I’m still running the essential errands, and though my amazing contributors have tons of great content lined up, I’ve actually craved writing blog posts (maybe it’s a small sort of therapy for me?), so you’ll be seeing me around here as well.
But I’m saying no thank you to most non-essential invitations/events, I’m consciously trying to set energy aside for dealing with life’s daily hiccups before they derail me, and I’m just generally trying to keep it simple. As an example, yesterday was our wedding anniversary and our celebration consisted of lingering in bed in the morning to reminisce about our wedding day, snapping the blurry photo above, and catching a late movie last night. Just the right speed for me at the moment!
Thank you again for being such a supportive, uplifting community. I’ve felt nothing but love and acceptance from you. It means the world. Supporting Friends Who’ve Lost Children
By Amy Hackworth. Painting, “Never Empty Handed,” by Clare Elsaesser.
Although I’d always felt sympathetic when I heard of a child who’d passed away, my heart ached a little more fiercely when I heard about such tragedies once I’d become a mother. Before I had a chance to push it away, the thought of losing one of our children made my chest tighten and my stomach drop.
And then one of my dearest friends said goodbye to her almost-two-year-old, and I came a little closer to understanding the grief that comes with losing a child. I learned that the sympathy I’d felt for other parents before watching my friend Molly lose her little Lucy in 2008 had been wholly uninformed. I’d had no idea of the heartbreak, the emptiness, the despair, the reality of grief. And still, I don’t really know what a grieving parent feels, but I have watched from a closer distance now, and my sympathy has matured.
For this small series on supporting our friends when they are hurting (see previous posts here and here), Molly and her husband Vic shared some of the things that helped them most when their little Lucy passed away. The first thing Molly said was that it really is the thought that counts, but it only counts if the person knows you’re thinking of them. Reaching out in almost anyway helped Molly: Facebook notes, texts, cards, emails. Imagine how hard it must be to think that the rest of the world is going on with life while you are truly heartbroken. And then imagine how comforting it must be to know that friends have not forgotten you, but remember your suffering and send their love. A friend of Vic’s from law school whom Molly has never even met sent them a handwritten card every week for a few months, then once a month for two whole years, offering her support in a very real and very consistent way.
… The Treehouse
By Gabrielle.
This is the story of how The Treehouse, our home in Oakland, came to be ours.
This is the long version of the story. I’m still figuring out how to tell it in a short version.
Starting last summer, when we embarked on our final year in France, we started looking online at real estate in Colorado. We had loved living in Colorado and our plans never strayed from moving back. We just needed to find a house. We wanted to buy something and settle down. In fact, that was our original plan when we first moved to Colorado, but at the time, we weren’t able to find a house, and then we got distracted by France. : )
We really wanted to buy a house before we moved back, because I was overwhelmed by the idea of moving twice — first into a rental, and then into a purchased house, possibly in two different school districts. Ugh. Purchasing a house and moving directly in sounded ever so much more appealing.
… Big & Small DIY: Cloud Picnic Blanket and Napkins
Project By Gina Vide. Readied for publishing by Amy Christie.
Watching clouds float by under the summer skies is one of my favorite things to do in the summer, whether on a picnic or simply stealing a quiet blissful moment. Today’s Big + Small project gives you the chance to actually make a cloud of your own — cloud napkins, and an easy-to-transport cloud picnic blanket/tablecloth.
Children can make the simple cloud napkins with very little assistance from the grownups — just a couple of steps! And adults can make the wonderfully useable cloud tablecloth. It’s foldable, washable, and the handles make it easily transportable, too! A perfect picnic blanket.
You’ll have so much fun working side-by-side on this cloud project with your kids!
Big + Small’s can work together, and sail off together, on this Cloud Picnic! Let’s get started.
…Big & Small DIY: Cloud Picnic Blanket and NapkinsRead More »
Living With Kids: Sarah Sandidge, Revisited
By Gabrielle.
Remember Sarah? She showed us what life really looks like when you’re living with kids during a major home renovation. She also took my breath away with photos of their toddler daughter helping rewire the kitchen’s electrical (Not really! She was completely safe!), but Sarah just laughed at my worry (Really. She is completely cool like that.)
As she told us, “I’m planning to create a checklist to determine if you are emotionally and mentality capable of handling renovations with small children! I imagine most people are not. Here’s my advice: Be flexible and adaptable. If you are not that type of person, just don’t even think about it!” I hope she makes that list, don’t you? It would be hilarious to read.
But my favorite piece of wisdom from Sarah is this: “Even though the safety of our children is a high priority, our philosophy is to let the kids experience life…not protect them from it.” Pretty wonderful.
… Seventy Five Percent
By Gabrielle.
We are home!
It doesn’t quite feel like home yet, but it’s getting there. And we love this house!
I feel like I’m still recovering from last week. We knew clearing out the storage unit wouldn’t be the most fun thing we’ve ever done, but I didn’t understand exactly how challenging it would be. I think I’m still processing the whole thing.
Would you indulge me if I vent for a bit?
… Living With Kids: Laura Hall
By Gabrielle. Images by Iris Thorsteinsdottir for Kid & Coe.
I’m fond of our home tours for a lot of reasons, but one of my favorites is that it gives me the chance to truly learn about living with kids in every corner of the world. Practical advice and personal experience from real families are the best, made even better with pictures and local accents! As I mentioned to Laura this week, you just never know where you’ll want to move your family tomorrow. Perhaps to Bristol? It sure sound lovely. (And then there is the matter of Banksy, graffiti artist extraordinaire! How cool would it be to casually name-drop him as your neighbor?) I know you’re going to adore Laura and the Hall home, and I’m also pretty sure you’re going to love the company she keeps, known as Kid & Coe, especially if you’ve got little ones and despise traveling with all the gear they seem to accumulate! Welcome, Laura!
Q: Tell us all about your sweet family living in the UK!
A: Four of us live here. I’m Laura, the Communications Manager of Kid & Coe, traveler, magpie, and generally creative person. I’m joined by my husband Matt, an IT risk consultant by day (yawn!) but a dastardly food blogger and inventive cook by night (yum!). There’s also our bumptious three year old daughter Olivia, who loves to sing and read, often at the same time, and our four-year-old cat Sukie, who I rescued when she was just five weeks old. She’s lovely but thinks she’s a human most of the time.
Q: How did this house become your home? (And please tell us what it’s like to buy or rent in Bristol…just in case any of us are interested!)
A: We love our home so much! We bought it four years ago after living in a hip city center apartment, because we wanted to be near a park and to have a family in a lovely area. I got pregnant within a month of moving in. I have so many friends on this street and the next who all have three year olds. Who knows what they’re putting in the water!
One of the best things in my life was getting pregnant while living here. We live on top of a hill, and one day I was puffing up it, heavily pregnant, when a lady opened her door and invited me in for tea. She had a bunch of other mums from the street having tea in her garden, and just like that I was invited into the Richmond Street mums club! It’s lovely, and I really like that the vibe is like that round here.
… Teaching Kids About Money
By Amy Hackworth. Mason Jar Piggy Bank via Heritage Tree Soap Co.
When I was six or seven, my dad and I were at a favorite convenience store with the most enticing array of ice cream flavors and the best waffle cones. I can still smell them as they came off the iron. When I asked for an ice cream cone he said he didn’t have any money with him. No problem, I thought, and glibly suggested he just write a check, a proposal that practically begged for the “money doesn’t grow on trees” speech that followed.
Now that I’m a parent, I have a little more sympathy for my dad’s frustration. Teaching kids about money is no small task, and I love discussing great ideas and best practices. Years ago, Gabrielle’s sister Sara wrote a guest post about their family bank that inspired and motivated me, with great suggestions on breaking down earnings for giving, long term savings, short terms savings, and spending. I’ve thought about that post for years, and I’ve always gotten a kick out of the fact that the kids got a sucker with every trip to the family bank, since that was always my favorite part of a trip to the bank with my mom.
… DIY: Tissue Paper Bowls
Text and images by Amy Christie for Design Mom.
What is it about little bowls and containers? I’m drawn to them like a magnet. I set them on side tables and dressers. In bathrooms and living rooms. I use them collect bits and bobs — jewelry, safety pins, beads, crafts supplies, keys… And when I come up with a way to make them myself. Well. Suddenly I am compelled to make. all. the. bowls.
If you have a thing for bowls — or for pretty tissue paper — I think you’re going to really like this tissue paper bowls project.
You don’t need much to make this happen. Just tissue paper, white glue, a balloon or two and a brush. These tissue paper bowls are quick and easy and don’t require perfection. The hardest part is waiting for things to dry!
You can make your tissue paper bowls any size you want. Big or small, huge or tiny. Anything goes. And the colors are endless. Coordinate with your decor, the holiday party, or give a friend a set in their favorite colors. And you can make them lightweight and disposable, or more heavyweight, so you can keep them around awhile.
Ready to get started?
… Living With Kids: Elise Morris
By Gabrielle.
Elise Morris has a super cute son, so it’s kind of fitting that she has made him a home to match! It’s fresh, bright, rugged inside and out, and mostly uncluttered, except for beautiful treasures and fun bits, and airy enough to hold a young boy’s ideas. All of them. To add more cool to the mix, Elise is an artist. Her work is so soothing that I found myself zooming in for minutes on end at the art in her living room. (I think you will, too!) For some unknown reason, I couldn’t help but think that she must be a patient and wonderful mom to Jonah…simply from her brilliant use of color and talented brushstrokes! I’m sure there’s a connection, right? While we discuss that, let’s welcome Elise and her little guy. Enjoy the tour, Friends.
Q: Please tell us who makes this sweet house a home.
A: I live here in the Bay Area with my four-year-old son Jonah, two cats, and an involuntary bug collection that varies from day to day. I am a single mom with primary custody, and a full-time working artist. I am also a crazy project planner, organizer, and multi-tasker! Jonah is a very curious and suddenly talkative preschooler who keeps me on my toes.
Q: How did this home come to be yours?
A: After going through an unexpected divorce, I had to move out of our condo and sort everything out. Jonah was two years old. I wanted a fresh start, so I considered locations a bit further east where I already have some good friends. The goal was moving to an area where Jonah could have space to play and be able to attend good schools. I never would have pictured myself living in a suburb, but as it goes, having a child makes the priorities clear.
… Homesick Foods
By Gabrielle. Image by Katharina.
Well, hello. Here I am waving to you from Oakland, California!!
We made it. We arrived Monday night. My siblings and nephews (Jordan and Jared and Liz and Sara and Henry and Moses) met us at the airport (SFO) with cheers and a welcome sign. So fun!! My kids could not have been happier.
The Aunts hung out with all the kids (and the luggage + bags — 32 pieces total!), while my brother Jared took me and Ben Blair to rent a van. It’s a huge extended cab van that fits all our luggage. It’s kind of hilarious and awesome at the same time. We have felt like our very own tour group driving it around this week.
We got to the house at about 9:00 PM on Monday night. The sun set as we drove from the airport and we listened to a California mix Ralph had burned to a CD. The lights of the city and the bridges were spectacular. We were feeling a particular mix of satisfaction and expectation, of relief and excitement, and of exhaustion but general awe at this move. Everyone was happy.
The best thing we did to make these first couple of days in California smooth? We hired a wonderful assistant here in Oakland, named Jessica, to prep the house for us. We asked her to set up utilities in our name, and make an internet installation appointment. And we knew we’d be exhausted after our 20 hour traveling day and want to collapse immediately, so we asked Jessica to prep the beds, and fill the fridge with food. (Note: the house is currently furnished, but not with our belongings from Colorado. More on that when I introduce the house in a later post.)
When we arrived, the house was ready and welcoming. We spent some time exploring our new digs, brought in the luggage, oohed and aahed over the contents of the refrigerator, climbed into pjs, and fell asleep within minutes.
Long satisfied sigh.
For the grocery list we sent to Jessica, we asked the kids to name the foods they were craving most from America, and added a few basic staples. Friends, it was mostly junk food! But man oh man it was fun to chow down on so many old familiar favorites when we woke up the next day. Which, by the way, happened at about 3:00 AM California time. (Hah! Hello, Jet lag.)
There’s something so powerful and beautiful about familiar food. It felt like a celebration. Want to see what made the list?
… Living With Kids: Haeley Giambalvo
By Gabrielle.
This tour is a snapshot of sorts, because by the time I publish it the Giambalvos will be happily ensconced in their new Texas home. But for the past seven years, this Chicago condo has nurtured a young family. There’s been stellar skyline views, all the city noises and its rushed pace, and more than enough room for all the creative projects Haeley can imagine and bring to life. In short, it’s been one of those homes the family will remember. I love homes like that. Friends, meet Haeley and her family. Please enjoy the tour, and give them a wave as they make their way to Texas!
Q: Tell us about this Chicago family — and soon-to-be Texans!
A: The Giambalvos consist of my husband Ross, Stella (three years) and Hazel (23 months). Ross and I met while attending the University of Pennsylvania in Philadelphia, and spent several years on the East Coast before deciding to call Chicago our home shortly after we got married. We had no real reason to move here; we just thought it looked like an exciting city, and we weren’t disappointed!
I grew up in Nebraska, and Ross in Texas, so somehow Chicago felt a little closer to home. We were thrilled when we bought our first place: a three bedroom condo in the hipster neighborhood of Wicker Park with views of the Chicago skyline. Neither of us thought we’d have two kids here, but here we are seven years later. Stella and Hazel don’t know anything but the hustle and bustle of city life, which is so different than my experience as a child in small town Nebraska.
… Sharp Dressed Men
By Gabrielle. Dapper gentlemen via The Sartorialist: Lunch for 25, Edition III.
Have you ever traveled someplace new and marveled at the way the locals dress? Me too. I always study women’s style for my own inspiration, but I also take note of what the men are wearing. That way, I can alert Ben Blair that cropped suit pants and no socks are quite the thing!
When we lived in New York, men took fashion risks. It was completely normal not to double-take when seeing a guy wearing a skirt or brightly colored garb. Slowly but surely, fashion stopped mattering the bigger and bolder it got! Funny, right? In Colorado, men’s fashion was a little more earthy and functional. And in Europe, it seems like men are born wearing a scarf and layers that work in any climate and any setting. I’m totally looking forward to seeing what style secrets Oakland will share with my men! (So is Ralph!)
What are the men wearing in your neck of the woods? More importantly, what do you wish they would wear?!
P.S. — Oscar is developing some strong opinions about style. He had his hair cut on Tuesday morning, and independently of me and Ben, asked the stylist for a faux-hawk. Hearing him request it in French was pretty much the cutest thing ever. Portraits of Fourth-Graders Around the World
By Koseli. Images via Taxi.
Photographer Judy Gelles traveled the world to take portraits of fourth graders and ask them three questions: Who do you live with? What do you wish for? What do you worry about? The resulting photos and responses are as candid and frank as an interviewer could ask for —and so sweetly child-like. It’s also interesting to note that a common thread among the responses was an emphasis on their own family. How wonderful is that?
Packing Up
Image and text by Gabrielle
Last week I was confidently telling Ben Blair that packing up would be a snap, and that we’d be able to spend this last week in France relaxing in this gorgeous home. Hah! Today my confidence is less confident. I forget so easily how quickly “stuff” accumulates. Let’s take schoolwork for example. Think of all the schoolwork your child brought home this year. Now times that by 6 kids. Now times that by 2 1/2 school years. That’s a lot of stuff!
So we’re going through the stacks of notebooks and binders, and trying to make wise decisions on what to keep and what we won’t miss. And we’re helping the kids sort through their emotions about saying goodbye to things that might feel precious at the moment, but will be forgotten shortly. Then, figuring out if it’s better to ship the keepers to California, or if we can make room in our allotted luggage without going over airline weight limits. And that’s just the school stuff. : )
Oh man, I can not wait till the packing is done. I am plowing through it as quickly as possible because it’s my least favorite thing.
But it’s not just the packing, I’m quite the basket case this week. Trying to pack. Trying to get my blog work done and my Alt Summit work done (Alt Summit SF is next week!). Desperately trying to be present during these last days before our move.
Honestly, I don’t remember feeling this emotional about a move before. There’s so much in my head, and I want to write about it, but feel like I won’t have time for weeks. I’m craving more hours in the day in the worst way.
Tell me, Friends. Have you had a particularly challenging move? Share your horror stories, and your most beautiful/hopeful moments mid-move. I’m sure I’m not alone!
P.S. — Please forgive me if posts are late this week, or if I can’t respond to comments as quickly as I’d like to. I’m doing my best, I promise. : ) Can Money Buy Happiness?
By Amy Hackworth. Image by Caravan Shoppe.
We’ve heard repeatedly since we were young that money doesn’t buy happiness, but it can be tempting to test the theory out on our own, just to be sure. If you’re driving an old car, it’s hard to imagine you wouldn’t be a little happier with better gas mileage and air conditioning that actually works. And what if you could buy that perfect sofa that’s several hundred dollars out of your price range? Isn’t it possible that would make you just a bit happier?
Research by professors Elizabeth Dunn and Michael Norton suggests that, for the most part, the old adage is true. A new car, or even a new house, doesn’t affect our happiness for long. Although we might experience initial excitement or enthusiasm for those kinds of purchases, we’re wrong when we predict they’ll make us happier.
… How Do You Treat a Cold?
[ UPDATE: Voting is now closed. ]
By Gabrielle.
If I don’t get enough sleep for a few nights in a row, I can pretty much guarantee a head cold. Are you the same? I woke up with one this morning and I’m trying to nip it in the bud quickly, because it’s only the second day of our summer vacation and having a sick mom is such a downer for my kids.
Tell me, Friends: How do treat your colds? Tea with honey, a visit to your doctor, extra sleep, or over-the-counter meds? Feel free to chime in by clicking a checkmark above.
As for me, I’m nursing my third cup cup of chamomile and taking a nap. : )
P.S. — Did you have a Happy 4th of July? Check out my instagram feed if you’d like to see what we were up to. A Few Things
Image and text by Gabrielle.
Hello, Friends! How are you doing? We are finally, sort-of, almost at the end of the school year! Ralph is done today. Maude and Olive will done on Tuesday. And Oscar and Betty will finish up on Wednesday. We’re in the home stretch! I’m pretty sure every American school is out for summer by now, but if not consider this a virtual fist-bump of solidarity for the longest school year ever. : )
Our big plans for the weekend? There’s a BBQ at the school on Saturday, and we also want to attack the ivy on The Cottage before it does more damage to the stone walls. I don’t know if I’ve ever looked forward to yard work so eagerly before! While I track down our gardening gloves and hedge clippers, here are a few things I thought you might enjoy:
– Why tipping should be illegal — skip the video and just read the text.
– It’s been awhile since I’ve watched a music video I’ve loved this much. Via Mrs. French.
– Did you know you can rent a vintage airstream?
– A scratch map to document your travels.
– Build your own 35mm camera.
– Culture does not make people. People make culture. (It’s 30 minutes, but so good!)
– A pretty in pink nursery.
– What happens to donated clothing?
– Time to nominate your favorite entrepreneur for Martha Stewart’s American Made! Categories include food, craft, design, style, gardening, and technology.
– On Babble this week: It’s time to pull out the flags! Here are ideas on how to decorate for The 4th. And a roundup of the best red, white & blue foods as well.
I hope you have a marvelous weekend! I’ll meet you back here on Monday. I miss you already.
kisses,
Gabrielle
P.S. — Alt Summit NYC inspired me to be more responsive on Instagram, and it’s been fun engaging in more conversations there. I’m @designmomblog if you’d like to follow along. What’s a Vacation to You?
[ UPDATE: Voting is now closed. ]
By Gabrielle.
I was talking with Ben Blair about vacations and mentioned how much I care about the accommodations — for me, a good hotel room feels like the ultimate luxury. But I realized, it’s not the hotel room exactly, it’s that I want to relax on vacation, and the hotel room helps to facilitate that. Though really, I know there are plenty of people that would choose the beach for relaxation over a hotel room any day!
So now I’m curious: When you think about and plan vacations, are you most drawn to the food scene, relaxation, culture & museums, or adventure? I’d love to know! Add your opinion by clicking on a checkmark above. Mount Everest
By Koseli. Image here.
I am endlessly fascinated and terrified by anything that has to do with Mount Everest. I’ve read Into Thin Air, watched inumerable documentaries on the subject, and scoured the internet for as much information on the peak as possible. There’s no end to the mystery and thrilling stories behind that prestigious climb. And for as much as I try, I cannot wrap my head around why someone would want to climb such a treacherous mountain; at the same time, I can imagine the complete and utter rush of accomplishing such an incredible feat. This time-lapse video of Mt. Everest captures that other-worldly natural drama that makes this peak almost magnetic.
I’d love to know: Is it hard for you to wrap your mind around such terrifying adventure like this? Or do you crave tackling seemingly insurmountable obstacles? And, just because I might die if one of you says yes: Has anyone climbed Mt. Everest?!!
P.S. — George Mallory, an English mountaineer who tackled Mt. Everest in the early 1920s, is famous for responding to the question, “Why do you want to climb Mt. Everest?” with “Because it’s there.” The audacity, am I right?