What if We Just Gave Them Money?
Did you get a chance to listen to or read the NPR story about fixing poverty? It was eye opening for me, and I keep thinking about it.
The title is: How To Fix Poverty: Why Not Just Give People Money? Here’s a paragraph from the article that will give you the basic idea of what it’s about:
Today practically all aid is given as “in-kind” donations — whether that’s food, an asset like a cow, job training or schoolbooks. And this means that, in effect, it’s the providers of aid — governments, donor organizations, even private individuals donating to a charity — who decide what poor people need most. But what if you just gave poor people cash with no strings attached? Let them decide how best to use it?
According to the piece at NPR, this kind of direct giving can be hugely beneficial.
… Living With Kids: Victoria Hudgins
You guys!! This house is such a show stopper. Nothing gets my interior design heart going pitter-patter more than people who aren’t afraid to make bold choices and really make their home personal and show off their style. If you feel the same way you’ll be swooning over Victoria’s house in Reno, Nevada. I mean, there is a pink fireplace (which I have already copied in my own home!). Not only that, Victoria and her husband did this whole renovation with kids underfoot. They even let them help!
Come say hello to Victoria.
… 6 Pieces of Advice from a Top High School Guidance Counselor
Have a child heading into high school soon? Here are 6 pieces of sound advice from a guidance counselor at one of the top high public schools in the country — who happens to be my sister-in-law, Liz Stanley. I shared this first in 2008, back when my Liz was working at a high school on the East Coast, and before my kids were old enough for high school, or even middle school. Now that I have some solid experience with kids in high school, I can confirm how good these tips are.
Here’s what Liz says:
I just had my first child almost 3 months ago and love being a mother and being with my baby. I’m grateful for this time away from work so we can bond.
Before the baby, I was working as a high school counselor, and coaching the girls lacrosse team, in a really good New Jersey school for the last three years. I miss it a lot. One thing I love about my job as a guidance counselor is the ability in my position to see and understand the school district as a whole. I’ve been able to appreciate this more and more as I’ve realized how this information can serve me when my own kids are in high school. I know some of you don’t have teens yet (obviously, neither do I) but here are my “notes to self” — just in you want to file them away.
Get involved in the school in some capacity.
Duh, right? But really, make it a priority, and it doesn’t have to be a huge commitment. It can be as simple as joining an advisory board or attending PTA meetings on a regular basis. Your voice is important. It’s your child’s education for goodness sake.Having a good relationship with the counselor is a big advantage.
I recognize that if I was a gym teacher I would probably say “Having a good trusting relationship with the gym teacher is key” and I don’t mean to be obnoxious, but growing up, my high school counselor happened to be a close family friend. So of course, all of my siblings and both my parents had no hesitation asking him for advice and direction. And it was really helpful. As I entered the same career, I was surprised to find that many high schoolers barely know their counselor and that many parents are hesitant to ‘bother’ their kids’ counselor. I say do it. Bother away. But bother nicely of course — your aim is to make the counselor a friend and ally. They are truly trained to help and support your student. If you are tight with the counselor you’ll likely get an invaluable perspective into the school and studentbody and your child’s place in all of it — a perspective that teachers (and the students themselves) aren’t able to offer. …6 Pieces of Advice from a Top High School Guidance CounselorRead More »
Did You Ever Consider Having A Big Family?
The other day, I received an email with a question about big families from a reader named Megan, and I thought you might like to chime in with some advice. Here’s the email:
I’m a mom to four boys under the age of 6. I have 3 year old twins, a 5 year old, and a 6 year old. All of our boys are adopted from South Korea, and we are super lucky to be their parents. I’d love your thoughts on something. How did you decide to have a big family? My husband and I love having a big family and would like to add another kid or 2 (either by adoption or biologically…I don’t know yet), but we feel like a circus act everywhere we go currently!
… Living With Kids: Janette Swain
Have you heard the term “Sandwich Generation” before? It describes the situation may young families find themselves in when you are still caring for your own kids at home, but also have to start caring for your aging parent. Today’s Living With Kids mom, Janette, did just that when her father was diagnosed with Parkinson’s and needed more help around the house.
Fitting her own family into her parents home and being limited in what design decisions she could make to make the home feel like her own really forced Janette to prioritize and make creative decisions.
Please give a warm welcome to Janette.
… The Days of Secrets Are Over
Did you happen to see the fascinating and really well-told story about the woman who thought she was Irish, until a DNA test opened a 100 year old mystery? I really want to discuss it with you, but don’t want to give away any spoilers if you haven’t read it yet. (Go read it!)
Underlying the story, the article is about identity. How much do the labels we give ourselves really mean? And the article is also about DNA tests in general, and the unexpected results that many people are experiencing. Along those lines, one paragraph stood out to me:
… Living With Kids: Margot Ogmundson
Margot lives in British Columbia, Canada. When Margot first emailed me about sharing her home and story, she introduced herself by saying “we our raising our boys, two in our arms, one in our hearts.” My breath caught. What a simple, beautiful way to describe something as difficult as the loss of a child. I’m so grateful for the chance to read her perspective.
… A Perfect Day in Oakland
I’m feeling an extra-dose of Oakland Pride today — I sure love living here! For the final post in my 3-part series with Uber, I’m going to take you on a little tour of Oakland, and give you a helpful itinerary for your next visit. If you are traveling to the Bay Area, consider taking a break from San Francisco and spending the day across the Bay Bridge. It’s sunny over here!
We used uberX for our entire day of exploring. It made life so easy for us. We could go door-to-door with ease, and didn’t have to deal with finding parking (which can be a big challenge in Oakland), or paying for parking (which can be very expensive in Oakland). Here’s my suggested itinerary for A Perfect Day in Oakland:
8:30 – Classic Breakfast
Start with a lazy breakfast at Sequoia Diner in the Laurel District. The menu is classic diner food, but upscaled and made with super fresh ingredients. Try the Coconut Almond Granola, or the Herb and Goat Cheese Omelet (served with a buttered slice of house made sourdough). Don’t be surprised to find a line out the door for this popular brunch spot, but it’s worth the wait. …The Treehouse: Family Room Design Ideas
Are you ready? It’s before and after time! I could not be more excited to share this Family Room redesign with you. I worked with Room & Board to transform the space and I am absolutely joyful about how it turned out. The room is full of light and color. It’s comfortable and inviting. It’s practical and useful. And now we spend at least 70% more time in the room than we used to. Not joking. And more on that in a bit.
But first, let’s watch this time lapse video and then go see some pictures and details. The video was captured on the day that the big Room & Board delivery came to our house. It’s best with the volume turned up:
…Living With Kids: Khrista Cornista
I’m excited today to introduce you to this week’s Living With Kids family, the Cornistas. Khrista and her husband are both immigrants from the Philippines and work in the medical profession. When they started their family, they wanted to stay in Los Angeles, but they were priced-out of real estate there, and ended up settling down in Santa Clarita — which is still in Los Angeles county, but about 30 miles north of the city. Their home has a calming and classic color palette and a lot of fun details that I think you’ll really enjoy.
Come say hello! Here’s Khrista: … Will My Kids Ever Own A Car? Or A House? Will They Even Want To?
There was an article in The Atlantic a few weeks ago called The Cheapest Generation, Did you get a chance to read it? It talks about the shift in spending habits between Generation X (my generation), and Generation Y (Millennials). I feel like the title is misleading — it sounds like it’s going to paint Millennials as some sort of cheapskates, but it doesn’t do that — and thank goodness, because I’m definitely over articles that drag Millennials. Geez. They get blamed for everything.
Instead of the cheapskate angle, the article is really more about how Generation Y is making different spending choices than their predecessors. Which personally, I don’t see as a bad thing, even though I realize it could have major repercussions on our economy as we’ve known it.
Basically, it turns out Millennials are not buying houses or cars, and it goes into some of the strategies car companies have been using to try and reverse that trend.
…Will My Kids Ever Own A Car? Or A House? Will They Even Want To?Read More »
Living With Kids: Sandra Jergensen
I feel like Sandra and I are kindred spirits, and I have had so much fun getting to virtually poke around her house. Sandra’s a cook, an editor, a mom, and has a flair for saturated colors and unexpected design decisions. (There is a polka-dot wall I am sort of swooning over and planning to copy in my own home soon.) Her home is such a fun mix of mid-century modern and vintage pieces that I have no doubt you’ll have as much fun exploring and getting to know her as I have.
Say hello to Sandra:
… How Do You Feel About Eating Bugs?
“Nobody likes me, everybody hates me, guess I’ll go eat worms.”
Do you remember that song? Did you ever hear it as a kid? I have no memory of the context around it, (where did it come from? why were we singing it?), but it came to mind when I was reading about new cooking flours and powders made from crickets.
Apparently, the flours can be used to add extra protein into baked goods, beans & rice, pancakes, and dinner dishes. The description on a bag of 100% cricket powder says: Cricket contains twice as much protein as beef, as much calcium as milk, as much Vitamin B12 as salmon, and 17 amino acids, including Lysine. I’ve seen cricket snack chips and protein bars too.
The powder is said to be incredibly high in protein, but requires much fewer resources to raise than other types of animal products. And I suppose there could be less of a meat-is-murder guilt factor for some people when eating bug protein than they might experience eating beef or pork. (Though who knows. Is it morally better to kill 1 chicken or kill thousands and thousands of bugs? I don’t pretend to have an answer.)
Predictions are that eating bugs will become a totally normal thing here in the U.S.. From this article:
“A growing need for more food sources as well as a desire to treat animals more humanely have proponents predicting entomophagy, or eating insects, will eventually spread more heavily to western and developed countries. They envision pancakes made with cricket flour or falafel chocked full of mealworm goodness will be just as desirable as sushi.
“Sushi took 30, 40 years to really become a normal thing, but kale took like five years and kale’s not even very tasty,” said Allen, head of Austin, Texas-based Little Herds, a nonprofit founded to educate the public on the nutritional and environmental benefits of edible insects.”
I haven’t yet tried any foods made mainly with insect protein (or if I have, I’m not aware of it), but I’m open to it. At least, I’m open to a processed version of insect protein that doesn’t look bug-like in any way. I know there are places in the world where eating bugs in their natural bug form is not unusual, but I doubt I could personally ever get used to that. A powder on the other hand, I can probably handle.
What’s your take? Does the whole idea of insect-based flour gross you out? Would you eat a cookie made with cricket flour? How about your kids? For those of you who are vegan, do you classify insect-based food the same way you classify animal-based food? Or is it in a different category? And what do you think of the predictions? Will we all be eating cricket powder food in the next few years?
P.S. — I read that if you have a crustacean shellfish allergy, you may be sensitive to crickets. Also, Gateway Bug tshirt found here. Living With Kids: Jill Pauli
I’m so excited to introduce you guys to Jill. She’s a mom, an artist, a scientist, an entrepreneur, and so much more. You’re going to love her intentionally-small home in the San Francisco Bay area. It’s full of light and art, two of the most important ingredients in making a home beautiful. What makes it even more special is that a lot of Jill’s art is either made by her, or by people she loves. How great is that?
Welcome, Jill!
… The Ideal Age For a First Cell Phone
I’ve been getting so many thought-provoking questions from readers this summer, including a very short one that came in last week: I am a longtime reader of your blog and wanted to know, what age did your kids get a phone? — Michelle
I have a few thoughts on this topic, but I’m especially interested in hearing how you’ve handled this at your house. I really believe this is an area where we all need to share what we’ve learned so far. So I hope you’ll chime in. Here are my thoughts.
1) Our 3 youngest kids, currently aged 12, 11 and 7, don’t have cell phones. They have access to screens — the family iPad, the family desktop iMac — but they don’t have their own phones, or even iPods. At one point, our son Oscar was set to inherit a hand-me-down phone that he could use as an iPod, but it ended up being old and faulty and didn’t really work out.
Our 3 oldest kids, currently aged 15, 18 and 19, all received their first phone during high school. When we moved from France to Oakland, Ralph started his sophomore of high school, and Maude started her freshman year, and they both got their first official cell phones as the school year started. In France, we had experimented with some basic flip-phones for them to use in emergencies, but their first real data phones didn’t happen till we moved back to the States.
Apparently, that makes us somewhat unusual. Surveys show that back in 2010, 69% of 11-14 year olds, and 31% of kids aged 8-10 had cell phones. I assume the numbers are even higher these days. But, I don’t think it’s as strange as the statistics makes it sound. I feel like we know many families here, with kids in middle school, who don’t give their kids cell phones yet.
… The 4th of July Felt Different This Year
Raise your hand if Independence Day felt a little different to you this year. At our house it mostly felt the same as usual, but not totally. The activities were definitely the usual — we did 3 main things: we watched fireworks on the field after the Oakland A’s game, we watched a community parade (where Betty, Oscar and Olive helped hand out programs), and we had a very casual get together for burgers at our house.
What felt different this year:
… Her Daughter Asked: Why Do I Need to Wear my First Bra?
Friends, I need your collective wisdom. I received an email from a reader named Tina that brought up a really good question: What do you tell a 10-year-old who wonders why she needs to wear her first bra? Here’s an excerpt from Tina’s note:
“I have two daughters ages 10 (11 later this summer) and 7. On a whim, while on a rare after school trip to Target a few months ago, I asked my daughter if she wanted to pick out a bra. (Most all her friends started wearing bras sometime over this past school year.) She said sure. She has only worn her first bra a few times, and until a month or two ago, didn’t need it. However, now buds are starting to show through her shirt so I approached her about buying more bras to wear everyday. She asked why she needs a bra. Admittedly that question stumped me.
…Her Daughter Asked: Why Do I Need to Wear my First Bra?Read More »
Would You Call the Police if You Were in Danger?
I know the news cycle is fast, and maybe people have already moved on with yet another headline, but I’m still thinking about Philando Castile. Like most people, I hadn’t seen any footage of Philando Castile’s horrible and completely preventable, totally unnecessary killing until after the officer was found not-guilty and the dashcam footage was released. Like most people, I was nauseous when I saw it, and then nauseous again when I remembered a jury found the officer not-guilty. Further retching came as footage showed how Diamond and her toddler were treated in such a demeaning, cruel, despicable way after the shooting.
In the conversations I’ve watched online, I haven’t see police officers speaking out on behalf of Philando Castile’s killer, which is good. But I haven’t seen them condemning the injustice of the verdict either.
In previous discussions we’ve had here about police violence against black citizens, some readers feel very defensive of police officers. And still others are married to cops or closely related to them and feel personally touched by news stories regarding police violence.
… My 3-Part System for Rotating & Storing Kids Clothes
My sister-in-law, Liz, was over at our house the other day and we were talking about rotating and storing kids clothing. How do you decide what to keep for a younger sibling and what to give away? And what about sentimental items? Then, once you’ve decided, where should all that stuff be stored? And how often do you need to go through this whole process?
She asked me to share how I handle it with our six kids and I thought about it for a minute, and realized that over the years, I’ve developed a 3-part system. I’ll give a quick overview of each part, and then go into detail. Hopefully this will be helpful to anyone out there struggling with organizing kid clothes and closets.
The first part is Scheduling. I approach this two different ways. Twice yearly, in the spring and the fall, I set aside a few hours to go through the kids’ closets for a seasonal switch and organization. And I also make ongoing clothing evaluations on a daily basis as we live our lives and do the laundry.
The second part is Sorting. Everything is assessed and sorted into 4 categories: keep, donate, trash or repurpose.
The third part of my system is Storage. We have specific places for off-season clothing, hand-me-downs, clothing-for-donation, and projects.
Here’s how we work it :
…My 3-Part System for Rotating & Storing Kids ClothesRead More »
Living With Kids: Laura George
Today’s home tour is taking us on the road. Laura George and her family spent their summer vacation on an epic road trip with their 6 young kids in a borrowed RV with spotty air conditioning. I know some of you are thinking: Sounds like the best summer ever! And others are thinking: No thank you a million times over. Hah!
Whatever your response, it certainly sounds like an adventure — one full of some epic highs and lows. Whether you’ve got your own family road trip planned this summer, or just know that inevitably you’re going to be spending some time with your kids in the car, Laura’s family’s journey is sure to inspire.
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