Image and text by Gabrielle. Oh my! This episode of Olive Us, called How to Visit a French Market, makes me homesick for France like crazy. The market in our town took place at the base of the local cathedral, which made for a magnificent backdrop while we picked out our vegetables. But the coolest thing, is that the market had been taking place in that same spot, by that same cathedrals for centuries. Literally centuries! In fact, early on in our stay we stopped at a vide grenier (a town yard sale) and found this very old lithograph showing our very same cathedral with a market scene happening. Isn’t that the coolest? It’s one of my favorite souvenirs from our time in France. You can see more closeups of the print here and here. (Bonus: is was 2 euros.) Related to shopping at the market, for months I’ve been working on a separate post about French food — what we missed, what habits we’ve continued since we got back — that sort of thing. I don’t know why it’s taking me so long to finish it up. I suppose it’s partly because I keep getting emotional when I work on it. : ) Anyway, shopping at the market featured in this video is definitely one of the things I miss. We went dozens and dozens of times and it never lost its charm. I hope you enjoy the video! And I’d love to know: Do you have access to a good local market where you live? There are great ones here in Oakland and we love when we make time to go. And if you’ve been to France, did you get the chance to visit an outdoor market? P.S. — Would you like to know more about Olive Us? Here you go: – Olive Us has a really charming Instagram stream. You should totally subscribe! – Find the official Olive Us website here, and subscribe to the Olive Us Newsletter here. – Find all the posts I’ve written about Olive Us — including every episode — here. – We’ve made 44 episodes so far and collaborated with ulive on 20 of them! You can find the Olive Us page on ulive here.

By Gabrielle. Photo of George H. Brimhall (see the P.S. for relevance). A little warning, this post is really long. : ) On Valentine’s Day weekend we ended up throwing 3 parties. Maude had friends over on Friday night — a little “GALantine’s” gathering with a pretty dessert table and chick flicks. Then on Saturday night, Ralph went to “Mormon Prom” a formal dance for LDS high school kids in the Bay Area who are 16 years old or older. We made corsages for the girls, and after the dance, the kids came to our house to hang out and have rootbeer floats. Then on Sunday, we hosted a “Policeman Party” for our nephew’s 4th birthday. And since there was no school on Monday, we had a sleepover for 3 of the cousins. (Sometime, I need to tell you more about the policeman party. It was a cute one.) At some point, I turned to Ben Blair and said, can you believe this? Two months ago it took everything in me to get a Christmas Tree, and this weekend we threw 3 parties and are ready for more! I’m doing so much better! So this post is a mental health report. I’ve been very open over the past several months about the status of my brain, and I’ve received dozens of emails from readers wondering how I knew my head wasn’t working right, how I recognized when to go to the doctor, and how the medication was working. Obviously, everyone who has experienced a downturn in their mental health has their own story, but here’s mine, in case it helps. …

Mental Health UpdateRead More »

By Gabrielle. Photography and assistance by Gina Vide of Willowday. My girls have worn their hair long — shoulder length or longer — for years now. It wasn’t always so, and I’m sure it won’t always be so. But for now, like many families, we keep a generous stash of hair bands in our bathroom drawer ready to secure hair into ponytails, braids, and buns as needed. So when my friend Gina from Sweden sent me a photo of wooden bead hair ties she’d made, I had to get in on the action too! They work just like a standard rubberband — you put them on with a typical figure 8 twist, then adjust them so the beads are on top. The beads are such simple accent, but they add loads of charming personality! Of course, they remind me of the hair bobbles of my childhood — with colorful plastic balls at the ends. But these are much gentler on your hair and more modern looking. Plus, you can make them in any color you like! I think a small box with 3 or 4 of these would make such a sweet gift. You could create them in springtime colors and include them in an Easter basket. Or they would be wonderful to make a birthday party — a happy little activity that guests can make and use right away. I’m just crazy about the contrast of the glittery band or colorful shiny elastic against raw wood. If you prefer a glossier look, you could paint the beads to match or compliment the elastics. The combinations are endless. These hair twists are easy to make; fun to make alone or with friends on a craft night! A special touch for the girls in your house — and for yourself as well. Let’s start making! …

A Perfect Gift: Hair Twists with Wood BeadsRead More »

By Gabrielle. Image of bell hooks — if you know the photographer, please share. February is quickly coming to a close, but before it’s officially over, I wanted to feature some of the best articles and bits of history related to Black History Month and racism that I’ve read this month. I’ve basically relied on Kelly Wickham as my source — she’s a genius and she’s done a fantastic job highlighting essays and blog posts over the past few weeks. I highly recommend following her. I suppose racism is always a topic on the minds of Americans, but it has especially been in my brain since Ralph and Maude started attending our public high school here in Oakland — a school with only a small percentage of white students, which is new experience for them. I grill my kids with questions about it: How often does race come up? How often does racial stereotyping happen? What kind of language do teenagers here use to discuss race? I get a little obsessed. It’s just that I want to be actively engaged in raising kids who will help eradicate racism in our country — I assume most parents feel the same way. But sometimes it’s hard to know where to start, and how to get it right. Here are three of the things I made note of this month: – It’s Not About You, and other adventures in privilege. “Whiteness is the reason that when I see a Muslim character on television, they’re more likely to be a terrorist than a love interest. Whiteness is incredibly problematic and we can and should question it and the ways in which it affects and harms people of colour. Because that’s what it’s about, see – not making white people feel bad, not white guilt or white-shaming or reverse racism. It’s about tearing off the shackles that bind us.” – bell hooks. An author I haven’t read, but now want to. I plan to start with All About Love. – The Blacked Out History tumblr. Really well done snippets of history. I learned about Maroon Communities which I had never heard of, and the 10 demands of the Black Panthers. UPDATE: A reader named April commented below and recommended two more blog posts that I found really compelling. I’m adding them here so you won’t miss them: – For Whites (Like Me). – How White People Will Ignore Obama’s Speech on Zimmerman. – There have also been 3 mentions of the book, NurtureShock in the comments — specifically the third chapter titled “Why White Parents Don’t Talk About Race”. Tell me, Friends, how do you teach your children about race and racism? Is it something you discuss as a family? Any related links you’ve come across this month? I’d love to hear.

Photo and text by Gabrielle. I like to listen to NPR when I’m in the car, and during the local news updates when a story about California is being shared, I’ll be listening in a removed way and then all of sudden think: Oh. I live in California! This story is relevant to my life! I’m a Californian! And then I think something along the lines of: That is so strange. A related thing happens when Ben Blair is driving and I look up from the passenger seat and see a landscape or cityscape that is completely unfamiliar and think: We’ve only been in the car for two minutes, but I wasn’t watching where we are going and I have no idea where we are and would have to use GPS to even point myself in the right direction if I wanted to head home. Basically, I’m in a funny situation where my home city and home state aren’t quite home yet. It’s not that I have regrets or complaints about moving here, it’s just that everything still feels so new and 7 months in I’m still playing catchup. This really hit home during my trip to Washington D.C. (I’m still here in D.C., writing this from my hotel room and will head back home today.) On Tuesday, I had the chance to lobby the senators and representatives from my state on behalf of ONE.org. ONE is bipartisan so we were lobbying both republicans and democrats. As we were being briefed the day before, I experienced a moment of identity crisis. My thoughts were something like: I’m lobbying for California? I haven’t even registered to vote there yet. I’m still using my Colorado driver’s license. I have only a slight handle on Bay Area geography — on which cities are where. And I have no idea who my congresswomen/congressmen are!! Luckily, California happens to have some famous names among our representatives (think Nancy Pelosi, Dianne Feinstein and Barbara Boxer), so I actually do know many of my representatives, and my identity crisis was short lived. I reminded myself I was born in California and lived there till I was 5. I learned to speak my native language in California. Growing up, I spent time in California every year of my life and both of my parents were born and raised in California. So I have deep roots in my new-again state. This trip has been a good reminder to me that it’s time to dive deep and really get to know my state and my city; to learn the problems and passions of California and of Oakland specifically, and to care (or care more) about the outcomes of propositions and proposals that affect my slice of the country. It also made me curious: Have you ever been in the same state-of-mind that I am in now? Have you ever been surprised that you are a resident of the state/country/city you reside in? Have you ever felt like a resident of no place at all — sort of detached from where you live? I imagine not everyone experiences this sort of thing. Where do you consider yourself a resident of? What are your thoughts? P.S. — I’ll give a full report of my trip to Washington later this week (or possibly next week.) But have to tell you how lovely it was when it snowed yesterday. The flakes were giant and fluffy and since Oakland doesn’t experience the sort of winter I’m accustomed to, it was a treat to have snowflakes on my nose and eyelashes.

Text and photos by Gabrielle. I’ve got another episode of Olive Us to share with you today. It’s called Nursery Rhymes and it’s a charmer! It features a collection of animal masks that we amassed while we lived in France — and that happily hang in our Oakland playroom today. Masks like these, in dozens of variations, are available at toy shops throughout France, and I found them irresistible. Though our visitors sometimes had differing reactions — some friends found the masks creepy as can be. Hah! The masks are so distinctive, that we thought it would be fun to use them in an episode — and nursery rhymes turned out to be a perfect fit. It was fun to come up with a list of which rhymes we would feature — and work in a few fairytale references too — like The Three Bears. Enjoy the episode! I love how this one turned out. I’d love to know: What’s your reaction to the masks? Lovely or scary? And do you have a favorite nursery rhyme? …

Olive Us: Nursery RhymesRead More »

I’m pleased as punch to tell you about the DIY concrete floor experiment that we tried in the reading loft of The Treehouse. I love how it turned out! The texture is wonderful. The floor looks layered and feels like it has depth — but the whole surface is barely 1/8″ deep! It’s easy to clean and maintain. It has the industrial look I am every drawn to. Plus, it was inexpensive and totally DIY-doable. I originally thought we would put carpet in the loft, but then I changed my mind and thought I would rather install a sweepable surface with an area rug on top. I made some inquiries about concrete floors and was told the weight of true concrete would be too heavy for this area, so I shifted my attention to tiles. But about that time, I read a blog post about resurfacing a laundry room counter with a thin layer of concrete and I wondered if I could try the same method on the reading loft floor to achieve a concrete look without the heavy weight. I finally concluded: why not try? The space is small and a low-traffic area. The materials are a bargain, so if it failed it wasn’t too great of a loss. Plus, if our DIY concrete floor was a disaster, I could cover it with tile or hardwood and hide the evidence. So I gathered the materials and went for it! Would you like to see how this DIY concrete floor came together? Let’s start with a few before shots. As you can see, the loft is a small raised area above the family room. The whole area is about 7 x 10 feet, and can be accessed by a ladder. The floor was unfinished — a simple plywood subfloor ready for carpet, tile, hardwood, or in our case: concrete!

DIY CONCRETE FLOOR – MATERIALS NEEDED

Next, let’s talk materials. The magic ingredient is Ardex Feather Finish. This stuff is simply a delight to work with! You can apply it in thin, thin, layers and then build it up to a beautiful finish. It used to be hard to find, but now it’s available online! You’ll also need a trowel or spreader — I liked using a couple of different sizes — plus an old bucket and spoon for mixing the Feather Finish.

DIY CONCRETE FLOOR – STEP BY STEP

Once I had the appropriate supplies, I reviewed directions for a DIY concrete floor found here and here. Essentially, you pour some Ardex Feather Finish (it’s a powder) into your bucket and add some water, then stir. You’re going for the texture of a thin pancake batter. I never measured the Feather Finish or the water. I would just add a little of each till the texture was right. I also worked in small batches — because this stuff dries really fast! After it’s mixed, I let it sit for 1 minute in the bucket to achieve a sort of “soft set”, then I would pour it out onto the floor and use the trowel to spread it. The first layer went directly on the plywood. (I swept and dusted it really well beforehand.) I worked in very thin layers for our DIY concrete floor. In fact, I could see the plywood through the concrete for the first few layers. I was working on this late at night, so I would do a layer, then head to bed and then let it dry over night. Which means the project dragged out for days! But the layers actually dry quite quickly, so you could truly tackle this on Saturday and finish the whole thing. Before I added each new layer, I would take a putty knife and scrape off any bits of dried concrete that were protruding too much, and I would give the entire floor a very light sanding. Then I would sweep up the dust and add another layer of Feather Finish. Ultimately, I built up 6 thin layers and then topped it with a thicker layer. But the whole DIY concrete floor is quite thin — maybe 1/8″ thick max.

DIY CONCRETE FLOOR – THINGS TO KNOW

One thing I learned: You can still see the seams of the subfloor (notice the vertical line on the right hand side of the photo above). In the case of the loft floor, having seams showing is fine with me because I knew it was an experiment and I had low expectations — plus, I’ll be adding an area rug which will cover the major seam anyway. But if I were doing it again, I would put down a layer of burlap cloth first. Apparently, applying the concrete over the burlap will hide the subfloor seams and prevent cracking. (I learned that little tip the day the floor was finished — I haven’t tried it yet, but I’m dying to!) At this point, I departed from the tutorials I linked to above and tried concrete stain, instead of the recommended sealant. This was a tip from sculptor who has worked with concrete before and knew this would add depth. And it totally did. The stain definitely created depth and also left bluish areas that look really cool! I really like how the stain affected the overall look. One other thing I learned: In addition to the Ardex Feather Finish, I also bought a bag of Ardex SD-M. The Feather Finish only comes in gray, but the SD-M comes in either gray or white. I chose white. I’d read that you can add a layer of SD-M on top of the Feather Finish if you want a whitish floor instead of a gray one — and that you can even tint or dye the SD-M if you want colored concrete. Since the floors downstairs were white-washed, I thought it might cool to keep the concrete white as well. So for layer number 5, I used SD-M instead of Feather Finish. Turns out, I didn’t like the look of the white at all! I much preferred the gray. And it might have been my imagination, but I felt like the SD-M wasn’t as easy to work with as the Feather Finish. Anyway, for layer 6, plus the finish layer, I went back to using Feather Finish. And that’s it. Pretty darn easy. Plus economical too! A bag of Feather Finish costs about $15 (in our case, the loft needed one full bag), and then you’ll need some concrete stain. A whole new floor for about $30 in materials! The reading loft is really coming together. One last note: as I mentioned above, the reading loft is low-traffic area. The concrete is doing great, but I really have no idea how this would hold up in a hallway or kitchen. That said, I think we might try it in another space — possibly the boys bedroom, or even the family room! If we do, I’ll be sure to share anything new we learn.

I’d love to hear what you think about our DIY concrete floor! Do you like the look of concrete floors or are they too industrial feeling for you? And would you ever try this sort of project/experiment yourself? Or do you prefer to stick to more proven methods?

 

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Credits: Photos and text by Gabrielle Blair.

Fun fact: over the weekend we got a microwave! It’s just a little one, but it gets great reviews — and it won’t take up too much space in our kitchen. I realize microwaves are nothing new, but as it turns out, we haven’t had one for over 3 years! It wasn’t really intentional, it just sort of happened. When we moved to France, the house we rented didn’t have a microwave. At first we wondered if microwaves were looked down upon in France, but learned later that wasn’t really the case. They are widely available anywhere small appliances are sold, and it wasn’t unusual for us to see one in our friends’ homes. Our landlords just preferred going old school, and didn’t keep one in their home. Since we were embracing the full La Cressonnière life (and originally thought we’d only be there for a year), we decided we didn’t need a microwave either. It took some getting used to. In fact, little June was only 9 months old when we moved to France, and I missed having a microwave to warm up tiny baby portions. But after a few weeks, we formed new habits and didn’t miss the microwave at all. Then, when we moved here, though The Treehouse came furnished, the previous homeowners weren’t microwave users. So once again, we were in a microwave-less home. And since we were out of practice using them, it didn’t occur to us to buy one until recently. This made me wonder: is there a “modern convenience” that you currently live without? I’m thinking of things like dishwashers, laundry machines, microwaves —maybe even Kitchen Aid mixers and toaster ovens. And if you had to choose, which one could you absolutely not live without? For me, laundry in my home is essential! Second, would be the dishwasher. We’ve had a dishwasher in our home since we first moved to New York in 2001 — it would be hard to give it up. In fact, the dishwasher here at The Treehouse broke within a week of moving here (it was from the 80’s and on its very last leg), and we had it replaced within the month. We missed it too much! As for other “modern conveniences”, I’m pretty flexible. I can live without a microwave. And I’ve never actually owned a stand mixer (shocking, I know. Hah!). How about you?  

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Tons of vintage dishwasher images here.

By Gabrielle. Goodness, but I adore Julie. She seems like the sort of person who’s incredibly happy with her everyday; that friend who pinches herself during even the littlest of mundane moments. Like loving any excuse to say that something or someone is “in the barn.” Isn’t that the cutest? And then there’s her mixed feelings when her youngest pops up in the middle of the night; we’ve all wished for a good night’s sleep, but when it’s almost nearing reality…sleepless doesn’t seem so bad, does it? Friends, I think you’re going to be quite taken with this tour – with both the open spaces and the open answers. Welcome, Thomas Family! Q: Please tell us about the family who lives on this gorgeous piece of land. A: Hello, and welcome! I live with my husband, who also happens to be my college sweetheart, and our three full-of-life sons. Hudson, ten, has a big heart, is a passionate football and basketball player, plays the guitar, enjoys the outdoors, is a great big brother, and a fun all-around guy. Noah, seven, is our resident comedian, creative and thoughtful, loves to whittle (yes you read that right), wows us with his Lego building and video gaming skills, and plays the piano with gusto. Lincoln, four, is a sweet, happy little boy who stays busy keeping up with his brothers, is crazy about sports, and has daily make-believe football and baseball games – all in which he is undefeated. …

Living With Kids: Julie ThomasRead More »

By Gabrielle. Handshake print by Paperchat. I’d love your thoughts on bartering. Do you do it? Did your parents? If yes, what sorts of things do you barter for? My Dad was big on bartering. He was good at it and he used his skills to give us childhood experiences that we couldn’t afford otherwise. My dad was a public school teacher and there were 8 kids. My mom was an adjunct professor at our local college, but Dad’s paycheck was what we mainly lived on, and as you can imagine, there was never quite enough money in the monthly budget. But my dad always had a side job going on as well. For many years, he ran a picture framing business from a workshop in our basement, and he would barter picture framing for things like my ballet lessons. Not joking! I remember my ballet teacher visiting our home so she could pick out frames and mats. When I was a teenager my parents published a newspaper for senior citizens as a side job, and my dad would barter ad space in the paper for things like dry-cleaning. I couldn’t afford an expensive wardrobe, but I could get anything dry cleaned at any time! I’ve been thinking about bartering — and especially bartering on behalf of kids — because Ben Blair and I bartered for June’s preschool this year. We’re making videos for the school in exchange for tuition — our biggest bartering experience by far. It’s been such a blessing! And it’s opened my eyes to other bartering possibilities. How about you? Is bartering in your genes? P.S. — My dad was also an epic haggler at flea markets and garage sales. But I can’t stand haggling! I’m the worst at it and I get so uncomfortable I basically remove myself from the situation. My stomach aches just remembering my dad haggling. Hah!

By Gabrielle. Image of me and Mara by Justin Hackworth for Alt Summit. This is a post about body image, but we’re going to get there by talking a little bit about sex — which I know I don’t really cover on Design Mom. So I’ll leave most of the conversation after the jump, and can you skip this post if it’s not your style. : ) I’m going to start the conversation with a new-to-me term: spectatoring. I first read about spectatoring on Shannon’s blog, and her post led me to watch the video above — a TEDx talk called The Sexy Lie. It’s very, very good. I hope you watch it. Spectatoring is when, instead of enjoying your time in bed with your partner, you mentally run down a list of all your body flaws, and assume your partner is thinking the worst of your body. …

SpectatoringRead More »

By Gabrielle. This home makes my heart jump a little. There’s a garden that reminds me of La Cressonnière, and stone walls and gorgeous beams that sweep me straight back to France. Boy, I miss that place. But Felicitas’ home is the perfect antidote for Europe-sickness! It’s a wonderfully balanced mix of old and new, austere and cozy. A place that lives in her childhood memories, but will also take center stage in her own daughters’ memories, too. Probably, that red garden door will, too. Friends, please welcome the Von Richthofens and enjoy the tour of their haus! Q: Please tell us all about the family who makes this house a home! A: Our little family is made up of me, Felicitas, and my husband, Raphael. We are both 33 years old and have two children: Viola is three years old, and Elenor is one. We live in a small village called Sondermuehlen in Germany. Raphael and I have been together since we met at school. I am an art historian working for the Kunsthalle Bielefeld. Raphael is director of the family enterprise, Stock Mode, which specializes in fashion. We own four stores in our town and neighborhood. …

Living With Kids: Felicitas Von RichthofenRead More »

Oil pulling is by far the most hippie thing I’ve ever done. If you had told me 2 months ago that I was about to stop brushing my teeth, my confused response would have been something like, “Because I’m going to be in coma?” Brushing teeth has been such a part of my daily routine (and no doubt yours as well) that I couldn’t even imagine life without it. So how did I become someone who has abandoned her trusty toothbrush and tube of toothpaste? Well, I am about to tell you all about my adventure, but first I have to tell you that if you have no desire to try oil-pulling that it won’t bother me at all. I am not writing this to convince you to try it. I really am not. I receive no benefits or advantages if you try it. Zero. I am not in league with any sort of Oil-Pulling World Domination Organization. I am not an authority on oil-pulling. I have not done extensive research on oil-pulling. I have not taught my kids to oil pull. We still go to the dentist — in fact, Betty was there for some cavity work last month. And if you do try it, and don’t like it, I won’t have my feelings hurt one little bit, and I won’t try to convince you to try it again. I promise. This post is just me, reporting on this odd thing I tried and happened to like. In early December, Ben Blair took a trip to France to oversee some work on The Cottage. While he was gone, I spent a Saturday morning seeing what was happening on Facebook and I happened upon an update from a woman I don’t even know very well, but she shared a link to someone’s blog post about oil-pulling, and said she was curious about it. And I was curious too. So I clicked through and spent an hour or so in an oil-pulling rabbit hole. …

Oil PullingRead More »

By Gabrielle. Images by Ben Blair. Oh man. This episode is an epic one. Here’s a little back story. When people visit the region of Normandy (which is where we lived in France, and where our little cottage is), the number one thing they want to see is Mont St. Michel. And while we were there, we visited this legendary island at least a dozen times. Every time we approached, there was this moment where we all of a sudden notice the castle-looking structure off in the distance — across fields of sheep — and our breath catches. And then, as we get closer and closer, there is this feeling of wonder. We loved visiting Mont St. Michel, wandering it’s tiny street and stairways, walking along the beach and exploring the boulders that surround the whole island, sitting quietly in the Abbey garden at the very top, taking in the views on the approach, and the views from high up on the mount. It’s a special place. So we weren’t too surprised when we learned it was one of the key pilgrimage sites for Christians. Makes sense! When we found out our local friend (and knowledgeable historian), Mark, had made the week long pilgrimage several times — going by foot from our town of Argentan to Mont St. Michel, and staying in gites (which are homes in the countryside that rent out a room for the night) along the way, we were intrigued! The idea of making a pilgrimage, a walking one, with a slow approach, was so appealing to both me and Ben Blair, and we talked about it a lot, and I wrote a post about it here. So getting to film this episode was simply a treasure. Mark acted as our guide, finding the prettiest routes and giving history lessons as we went. As you’ll notice in the episode, we learned that King Arthur legends have a place in Normandy as well as England, and that some people believe Arthur is buried along the pilgrimage trail — visiting his possible burial site was such an experience! I feel like there’s so much I could share about this video, but for now, I just hope you watch it and enjoy it. And if you’ve ever visited Mont St. Michel, I’d love to hear about it. I’d also love to know if anyone out there has made a religious pilgrimage before. Pilgrimages aren’t really a part of my religious upbringing, but they hold such an appeal for me. I hope to make one some day! …

Olive Us: Pilgrimage to Mont St. MichelRead More »

By Gabrielle. Images of little June and her hot cocoa by Blue Lily. Do fancy dinners and crying babies mix? Not when social media gets involved! According to this article and lots of play on Twitter, Chef Grant Achatz publicly broached the question all parents ask themselves — usually while blushing in the middle of a lovely restaurant when their child transforms into something not-so-lovely! — and the responses were surprisingly heated. His original tweet: To give you some back story, the restaurant in question is Alinea, a Michelin-starred spot that charges $250 per person upfront to reserve a table. Does that detail matter? It does when the couple in question was set to lose $500 just because their babysitter cancelled! Have you ever experienced a similar situation, whether from an embarrassed parent or an annoyed diner perspective? Has there been a time when you either sensed or were told outright that your children were not welcome in a particular restaurant? Were you understanding or outraged? Depending on where you live in the world, children are either welcomed with open arms and a kids menu, or the complete opposite, right? In France, children are raised with such impeccable table manners — learning to eat with a fork in their left hand, and a knife in their right from age 2! — that I was always so nervous about taking our big circus of a family to French restaurants. But we worked hard on our table etiquette as a family and ended up eating out freely. Still, even with great table manners, in our little town, restaurants were either considered family friendly and kids were welcome, or they were fancier and with few exceptions, we simply didn’t see kids there at all. (As I type this, it occurs to me, that that divide doesn’t sound too different from New York.) I can’t wait to hear your own stories and opinions!

By Gabrielle. Oh, you’re going to love this tour! It’s a holiday from our regular peeks into our everyday homes as we venture to a vacation home in Nicaragua. Certainly, there’s much less clutter and personal items – good thing Legos can fit well into carry-ons – but there are still signs that this is a wonderful home to fill with family memories. Like naps in hammocks. Crashing waves. Sand castles for days. Surfaces that get dirty and wet, but just need a good sweep every so often. Even better when those good sweeps are performed by a caretaker! One of the greatest things about Natalie and Jeff’s tour is that it comes to life with one click over to House Hunters International. (Consider this tour a spoiler if you haven’t seen their episode yet! Sorry!) So, Friends, please enjoy a little trip south of the border. Way south! Q: Tell us about the family who vacations in this incredible beachfront home! A: We are a family of four. My husband, Jeff, is a VP of Risk for a large regional bank  – nothing like Along Came Polly! I am the communications director for the National Underground Railroad Freedom Center, which is a museum of conscience that enables modern abolition through the lessons of the Underground Railroad. Our son, Colin, seven, is a sweet, gentle soul who nurtures an obsession with birds when he is not building Legos. Our son, Graham, four, is full of energy, loves to be the center of attention, and is always afraid he is missing something. His favorite question right now is, “Is it tomorrow?” …

Living With Kids: Natalie HastingsRead More »

By Gabrielle. Image by Ben Blair. Do you remember Betty in Paris? Fun fact: it’s the most viewed episode of Olive Us! And I can’t say I’m surprised. Paris is a magical place, and Betty in Paris is a magical video. We enjoyed making it so much, that we thought it would be fun to make episodes showing each of our kids exploring a famous city somewhere in the world — a mini-video-series within the larger Olive Us series. We like the idea of pairing up each child with a city that fits their personality. For example, (pretending we could somehow film anywhere) if we were making an episode for Maude, we picture Tokyo. For Olive, it would be New York. And today, I’m sharing video #2 in this mini-series: Ralph in London! This video definitely feels more teenager-y than our other Olive Us episodes — including the music! So your youngest viewers may not be drawn to it as much as our other videos. (I’m actually really curious about this, so please feel free to let me know what your kids think of it if you decide to have them watch it.) For this episode, Ben Blair and Ralph took a weekend trip to London last May (we were still living in France then, so it was easy as can be). Then they spent the weekend running all over town from morning till night, while Tiger in a Jar filmed. We had been to London a couple of times as a family at that point and Ralph had really fallen in love with it. He feels a connection with that city. So it’s a treat for me to see the city through his eyes in this video. In Betty in Paris, we show a 6 year old’s simple and sweet view of the city, but in Ralph in London, we show a grittier version of a day spent exploring. It’s interesting to me, because cities really do tend to have multiple personalities — so if we had filmed Betty in London, instead of Ralph in London, it would have been an entirely different video, while still staying true to a London experience. I love that! I love that the same city can mean something entirely different to different people. Have you ever been to London? If yes, did we capture any of your favorite spots in the city? And if we were filming a “You in Any City” episode, is there a particular city in the world you are most drawn to? (I can’t decide which city I would choose! Amsterdam? New York?) P.S. — Speaking of Betty in Paris, it just turned One! Join in the celebration here!! Would you like to know more about Olive Us? Here you go: – Find the official Olive Us website here, and subscribe to the Olive Us Newsletter here. – Find all the posts I’ve written about Olive Us — including every episode — here. – We’ve made 44 episodes so far and collaborated with ulive on 20 of them! You can find the Olive Us page on ulive here.

Image and text by Gabrielle. I feel like I age in spurts — like I look the same for years at a time, then suddenly, over a few weeks, I look several years older. For example, I’m quite sure I could have passed for 20 until I was 25, then overnight, I looked like I was 25 — that sort of thing. And from what I can tell, I think I’m in one of my aging spurts right this minute. When it ends, I’ll tell you how old I look. Hah! Late last night, I was taking off my makeup and taking out my contacts and chatting with Ben Blair about my possible aging spurt, and I asked him how he pictured his adult life when he was a kid or a teenager. I was curious to know how far into the future he had imagined himself. We both discovered that we hadn’t thought past 25. We had vaguely assumed a stereotypical life of kids, house, pet — but we had never considered what we ourselves would be like in our 30’s or beyond. It made me wonder if that is a typical thing for a child (not being able to conceive of a future self), or if there are people that have thought ahead to every stage of their someday life. Ben mentioned he’d read something about this topic, so I looked it up — it’s an NPR article. Turns out, people that envision their future self tend to make better decisions now. Which makes sense, of course! If you can picture yourself as an 85-year-old, an actual person who has a weekly tennis match and is learning to speak Chinese, I can imagine you’d be more likely to take better care of your body today. …

Your Future SelfRead More »

By Gabrielle. Image by my favorite childhood artist, Norman Rockwell. Oh my goodness. I can’t tell you how much I appreciate all the feedback and kind words you’ve shared in response to my 2014 plans. I have devoured every comment and am looking forward to responding to more of them. I truly, truly appreciate the support and thank you from the bottom of my heart. And now, on to a sort-of opposite topic: The word “bullying” is on my mind. I feel like it gets thrown around like crazy lately — and in some instances I find myself confused about how it applies. In an attempt to keep children safe from bullying (a worthy goal and one I fully support!), many schools have instituted a zero tolerance policy toward bullying and bad behavior. Does your school have one? Even if it doesn’t, I’m guessing you’ve heard this term once or twice, right? It is likely written in your school handbook in a bold font, mentioned often during PTA meetings and Back to School nights, and it has possibly even accompanied a few not-so-subtle warnings before your kids got on the school bus! After reading this editorial about some US school districts reconsidering the concept, I couldn’t wait to hear your thoughts. Since our return from France, I’ve really noticed the leaning in the US to act quickly and harshly when bullying or bad behavior is even remotely glimpsed. It seems like there’s not a lot of discussion or wiggle room or parent persuasion when it comes to breaking the rules — written or implied — in school. My initial instinct, is that I’m totally fine with that…I think! Because so far, we’ve not been directly touched by the policy. (Let me repeat: So far! I have six children, Friends! And there’s always tomorrow!) Then again, an acquaintance recently told me about her experience with zero tolerance. Her son attends an international school and was recently suspended for a day because another student reported him for bullying. She asked the Head of School to define bullying in this specific case, and was assured that her son hadn’t done anything of consequence. Rather, the complaint had to do with an uncomfortable feeling the other boy felt whenever he spoke to her son, likening it to a queasy stomach! After a long silence, the mother suggested that her son now had a queasy stomach, too. From speaking to the Head of School! As comical as this situation sounds, I’m sure it was super frustrating for all involved. I can tell you my response would not have been as reasonable or calm as my friend’s was — I think I would have freaked out if my child was suspended for vague reasons! I’d love to hear how zero tolerance makes itself known in your school experiences. Do you see it as too stringent? Too black and white? Or have you seen it work well to keep negative school behavior in check? Also, I’m curious to know if your school attempts to define bullying as part of their zero tolerance policy — I’m guessing different schools have widely different definitions. P.S. — I asked Ralph and Maude what bullying was like at their high school here in Oakland — specifically about whether or not homosexual kids felt like they could be safely and openly gay. They both answered that they didn’t see bullying against gay kids at all, and that any kind of mocking of homosexuals would be completely shut down by students at their school. I was glad to hear it! Sounds like progress to me.

By Gabrielle. Hooray for a fresh start to our Living With Kids tours! Let’s start 2014 with a home I could’ve probably photographed myself as Jessica and her family live in my neck of the woods. They’re renting in the gorgeous area of Cupertino in a Mackay-designed home, which seems to mean that the sunlight slides in so wonderfully throughout the day. Still, for all the sunshine there’s a tiny bit of rain in the Doll family’s life. But Jessica’s attitude turns those rainy days into another reason to cozy up on the couch with her boys and recognize that there’s beauty in downpours. Great windows and an even greater outlook on life are such gifts, don’t you think? Friends, I’m happy to welcome you to the Doll house! I hope you enjoy it. Q: Please tell us all about the lovely family who lives in the Doll house! A: We are a family of four, residing in the San Francisco Bay Area of California. I’m a professional photographer and blogger, and my husband is a Creative Director who loves to build and fly RC helicopters. …

Living With Kids: Jessica DollRead More »