A few weeks ago, we discussed an article that made French mothers sound a bit monstrous. Well apparently, French parenting is a hot topic. On Saturday, The Wall Street Journal printed this article about how French parenting is better, and it’s so positive that it’s practically glowing. Here’s an excerpt:
“When I asked French parents how they disciplined their children, it took them a few beats just to understand what I meant. “Ah, you mean how do we educate them?” they asked. “Discipline,” I soon realized, is a narrow, seldom-used notion that deals with punishment. Whereas “educating” (which has nothing to do with school) is something they imagined themselves to be doing all the time.
One of the keys to this education is the simple act of learning how to wait. It is why the French babies I meet mostly sleep through the night from two or three months old. Their parents don’t pick them up the second they start crying, allowing the babies to learn how to fall back asleep. It is also why French toddlers will sit happily at a restaurant. Rather than snacking all day like American children, they mostly have to wait until mealtime to eat.”
What do you think? Do you purposely and pointedly teach the ability-to-wait-nicely to your children? I can’t say I’ve been particularly good at it. But it does seem like such a valuable real-life skill!
The article isn’t too long, but it definitely has me examining my parenting methods. I hope you have a few minutes to give it a read — I’d love to hear what you think of it. Do you agree French parents are better?
I have a 9 year old, and am wondering, if we would like to institute more of these French techniques, what resources are there? I would like to get her to be more patient when having to wait (i.e. in church). I know I can start having her do things that she can do, like get her own dinner instead of sitting at the tv waiting for me to bring it, doing her own laundry (geez it’s once a week) etc. Plus how do we train them in these things when their friends are all doing it “the american way” such as we only expect them to sit with us adults at, say, lunch, until they are done eating and want to go play, then we say go on, go play. i would love to ease her into some of these things but how to do it? any suggestions?
I do recall that when I was a boy in France and up till the age of 16,Mothers in the 60’s-70’s and 80’s had the full control of their children,especialy “Discipline” !.First me like all the other girls and boys you attended maternal school from 4 to 7 years old,and our mothers put on us very short trousers with leather end suspenders,a nylon buttoned overall and a beret +a leather harness,and you were whipped with a leather “Martinet” ( a childrens little whip ,composed of a round wooden handle 30cm long with 10 to 12 leather tails 40cm long !) to whip your ass if you did’nt do as you were told,( at school the same thing!).Then from 7 to 11 years old you attended Elemantary school and the clothing was the same aswell as allways the Martinet whippings,only the leather harness was removed!otherwise the whole thing continued!Then from 11 to 16 years old when you went to college,you were allways dressed up the same way,and us the boys allways had to wear those short trousers but with clip on suspenders and pulled up very high so our mothers used to just pull up our nylon buttoned overalls and give you a good martinet whipping ,wich could happen anywhere!,in front of the school,in the streets and at homme of course,another thing too,because I forgot to mention it is that up to 16 our heads were “Shaved” allways by our mum’s thanks to their electric shaver!,And this went on till the middle of the 80’s ( but some parents still utilise it !).Now as for the girls their outfit to go to school was ,long pleated skirts with large suspenders ( suspender skirts)crossed in the back and straight in front!+a white blouse with big buttons in the front ,the beret like us aswell as nylon buttoned overalls ,but buttoned in the back and they received the same Martinet whippings as the boys ,( a matter of fact it was much easier for the mothers to whip their girls because all they had to do is lift up their suspender skirts and give it to them ! and up to the age of 16 just like us too !.Now if you pose me the question “why was it like this in France ,I just don’t know ,was it a fashion?,a habit? or just the tradition in France ? I don’t know it was like that Final